Recent comments in /f/relationship_advice

KrKrKr004 t1_iyfcn31 wrote

Reply to Trapped in my uniform, trapped in my relationship by RabbitRamsey

What do you do? The obvious answer, I would think, is to not continue doing what you're doing.

Your partner? A leach. Why would he care about a job and contributing to your 'household' when it's been at the point wherein you supported three people who you have never been 'obligated' to support? People go through tough times. People need help. Of course it's a good thing, when one is financially able, to offer not only love and support, but financial assistance when needed, but that's not what is happening here.

What do you do? Get your legal and financial ducks in a row, leave, and start building your own happiness and pay down that debt.

3

penny4athought t1_iyfcmhj wrote

Reply to My boyfriend is too nice by [deleted]

OP, I don't want to claim to know exactly how you feel, but I have BPD and I know how intense those feelings can be. Most people will just never understand how something so innocuous can feel like a dagger in the heart, and it's true those deep reactions aren't the problem of others to solve, but for a 'loved' one to keep putting you last is just wrong.

2

Peskypoints t1_iyfcioz wrote

Reply to Is she (22f) using me (25m)? Please, help understand her. by Nemesis3347

Her dumping her every thought and issue on you is trauma dumping and you may have created a trauma bond thinking that this sharing was because of a genuine connection, vulnerability and intimacy. Thing is she’s indiscriminate and will do this to anyone who sticks around long enough to listen. You are watching her emotional state unravel and you want to stick around and figure her out, thing is there’z nothing to figure out because she’a not behaving rationally. She’s also putting you in an impossible position by dragging her into her bad decision making by making you her confidant that she’s disappearing from her own life to go back to her abusive ex. There’s no sense in that!

FWIW, I don’t think this is a secret you should keep. She’s putting herself in danger. Being a danger to yourself or others is the literal criteria to be committed for psychiatric care

2

Lower_Ad_170 OP t1_iyfc8q6 wrote

Reply to comment by alexkartman in Sexless relationship by Lower_Ad_170

I would agree! He compliments me loads and says he wants to have sex but he is really cautious to now incase he doesn’t stay hard. I would love him to try taking something but I feel he would take offence if I suggested it, I can get him hard but he explains he then starts overthinking and can’t focus on the sex cos he’s worried about staying hard!

3

Mean_Environment4856 t1_iyfc8p8 wrote

Reply to Do I have to make him dinner? by [deleted]

You need to talk to him about it. If my partner is going to be home after dinner, I ask if he wants me to leave him food, or fend for himself. That determines what I cook for dinner that day. Bare minimum it's considerate to ask him.

2

genosonic t1_iyfc4o0 wrote

Reply to Me (23F) and my boyfriend (23m) are having issues because he has been lazy by [deleted]

> He is not a bad person now; he still pays 60% of the rent and sends me money when he thinks I need it, and when he is in bed, he listens to all the things that go on in my life without complaining, but half the time I am not sure if he is actually listening.

Just wow. This says everything. Probably the real reason you are still with him is because he's paying 60% of rent and "listening" to how difficult life is for you.

1