Recent comments in /f/relationship_advice

AutoModerator t1_iyf3q2o wrote

Reply to How do I stop being unreasonably upset at my girlfriends new haircut? by Icarus755

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throwingaway2846 OP t1_iyf3no8 wrote

Reply to comment by oiler1996 in Am I too close to my husband's best friend? by throwingaway2846

>Have you ever expressed to him how you want him to support you when you are talking about your emotions or feelings?

Yes, he's done a better job in a sense, but he still tries to fix my problem when all I want him to do is listen and sympathize. Most of my issues are just with dealing with 3 kids alone all day, then having to close at my job at night. I'm stressed and sometimes just need to vent. When I want solutions I usually state that before I start talking because I know sometimes he tunes in and out (which is totally fine when venting)

>Maybe start by asking him to just let you vent to him first, then start asking for his opinion on whats going

He sometimes does this, but usually he tells me he doesn't want to talk about whatever it is or tells me not to worry about his shit. I've told him this makes me feel left out of his emotions and thoughts and he apologizes.

>Would he be open to seeing a councilor with you? that way you can discuss your feelings and they can provide him with tips and tricks on how to respond and help you?

This is literally what I want. I don't want to see someone to "fix us" as he thinks, I just want a 3rd party there to help direct conversation in a polite and direct way with minimal confusion on our ends. He said he will not do this because he thinks they're going to convince me to leave him, that he's the source of the issues we have, be told that he needs to change, that I fell in love with someone broken etc. He doesn't grasp that I just want to communicate with him effectively. I'm exhausted, and I know he is too.

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AutoModerator t1_iyf3l92 wrote

Reply to I(19NB) love my dad(47M), but I don’t like him and it’s been that way for a while. How do I proceed? by Pester_Goblin7123

Welcome to /r/relationship_advice. Please make sure you read our rules here. We'd like to take this time to remind users that:

  • We do not allow any type of am I the asshole? or situations/content involving minors

  • Any sort of namecalling, insults,etc will result in the comment being removed and the user being banned. (Including but not limited to: slut, bitch, whore, for the streets, etc. It does not matter to whom you are referring.)

  • No referencing hateful subreddits and/or their rhetoric. Examples include, but is not limited to: red/blue/black/purplepill, FDS, MGTOW, etc. This includes, but is not limited to, referring to people as alpha/beta, calling yourself or users "friend-zoned", referring to people as Chads, Tyrones, or Staceys, pick-me's, or pornsick. Any infractions of this rule will result in a ban. This is not an all-inclusive list.

  • All bans in this subreddit are permanent. You don't get a free pass.

  • What we cannot give advice on: rants, unsolicited advice, medical conditions/advice, mental illness, letters to an ex, "body counts" or number of sexual partners, legal problems, financial problems, situations involving minors, and/or abuse (violence, sexual, emotional etc). All of these will be removed and locked. This is not an all-inclusive list.

If you have any questions, please send us a modmail.

#This is an automatic comment that appears on all posts. This comment does not necessarily mean your post violates any rules.

I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.

1

goatsnoatsonboats t1_iyf3gie wrote

Reply to I am really nervous to give blowjobs.. and that’s one of the reasons I drag my feet with sleeping with guys. What do I do? by [deleted]

There's tutorials for everything on YouTube and I'm willing to bet there's probably at least a few on blowjobs but don't worry if you're bad at it, speaking as a guy that nots even in the realm of deal breakers. Just be honest and tell him you don't have a lot of experience with that so he doesn't expect to have his mind blown. Most guys are just happy to receive oral even if it's not the best knob slob.

Just don't let yourself be pressured to do it if it's not something you're into.

2

Sad_Tiger_5068 t1_iyf3gfr wrote

Reply to comment by demidev3092 in Into someone else by [deleted]

My partner doesn’t have an issue with me going out to work functions & I have mentioned this coworkers name a few times. My partner often hangs out with people of the attracted sex. Messages, etc. anything to this extent? Probably not. I do apologize if my comments seem like I am playing the victim. I truly don’t mean to come off that way, I know I am the issue. I have created an epic issue that isn’t going to go away. But only dealt with. I have gone to my partner about not being happy with our sex life & it is usually pushed aside & not taken as a priority. I have even thought maybe I was gay, the reason for this is because I seemed so bored in bed & with our relationship but discovered I may just be bored & that’s it. Craving something different. My sexual needs aren’t met & I should have let go of this relationship sooner. For the sake of all of this. & now since I didn’t I fucked up. Thank you for your thoughtful & actual depth full response.

2

EvenOrchid6345 t1_iyf3dyp wrote

Reply to comment by [deleted] in Question by [deleted]

Wow what a surprise. Jk, it makes a lot of sense why he thinks you would believe his bullshit. He thinks you're a dumb baby, undeserving of respect and consideration. Are you packing yet?

2

throwaway3929295930 OP t1_iyf37qj wrote

Reply to comment by Reaper1704 in (M24) paying a woman to carry my babies by throwaway3929295930

> is there a reason you feel nobody would ever like you that way?

Well im not ugly or short. Im 6ft, I take very good care of my appearance and I have even spent money on it, i work out hard at the gym and im very career driven.

Its just that im introverted and im a bit socially awkward, I also never get any matches on tinder and I only get liked by the women who im not attracted to.

Im not that picky but as a man who is not overweight, doesnt have kids but wants some and who values sex in a relationship I want the same

1

Shibui50 t1_iyf37a7 wrote

Reply to My sister is neglecting my father’s care and lying to me about it. I live 2,700 miles away. by [deleted]

Somebody is going to be assigned as a care-giver if your father is demonstrated to be

incompetent regarding his Affairs of Daily Living (ADL-s). Your question is whether you

want to keep this in the family or not. Simple as that.

If you want to keep it in the family you need to identify a responsible person to do this.

If you Don't, or can't, keep it in the family, the authorities will identify someone if you

don't have anybody in mind. This is not rocket science and the authorities can be

a handful if you try to just squeak-by about this.

If your father is a Military Veteran you CAN work with the VA to address matters.

Of course, if he is going to be a dick and want to drink and smoke that is

something that will need to be addressed.

One other thing. Your father is 72? He's well into the age-range for dementia, given that

he both drinks and smokes. The fact that he fell and has no memory of it is Not a

good sign. If you are going to do something it needs to be sooner rather than later.

1