Recent comments in /f/relationship_advice

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1

Willofthesouth t1_ja20vju wrote

Tell him of your insecurities and apologize for going to the club without him that time. Ask him if he would be willing to set a boundary to protect your relationship: no going to clubs or other 'pick up' spots without the other. That way, there's no doubts, no false friends making false accusations of cheating and no people making unwanted passes.

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AutoModerator t1_ja1xbs5 wrote

Welcome to /r/relationship_advice. Please make sure you read our rules here. We'd like to take this time to remind users that:

  • We do not allow any type of am I the asshole? or situations/content involving minors

  • Any sort of namecalling, insults,etc will result in the comment being removed and the user being banned. (Including but not limited to: slut, bitch, whore, for the streets, etc. It does not matter to whom you are referring.)

  • ALL advice given must be good, ethical advice. Joke advice or advice that is conspiratorial or just plain terrible will be removed, and users my be subject to a ban.

  • No referencing hateful subreddits and/or their rhetoric. Examples include, but is not limited to: red/blue/black/purplepill, PUA, FDS, MGTOW, etc. This includes, but is not limited to, referring to people as alpha/beta, calling yourself or users "friend-zoned", referring to people as Chads, Tyrones, or Staceys, pick-me's, or pornsick. Any infractions of this rule will result in a ban. This is not an all-inclusive list.

  • All bans in this subreddit are permanent. You don't get a free pass.

  • What we cannot give advice on: rants, unsolicited advice, medical conditions/advice, mental illness, letters to an ex, "body counts" or number of sexual partners, legal problems, financial problems, situations involving minors, and/or abuse (violence, sexual, emotional etc). All of these will be removed and locked. This is not an all-inclusive list.

If you have any questions, please send us a modmail.


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1

xvszero t1_j6pk2ob wrote

Well for starters, if your current partner is toxic, dump them.

You seem to have an idea of why you are attracted to toxic men related to past trauma. Are you seeing a therapist for that?

Where do you meet the men you date?

As for the general question, there are 4 billion men in the world. Yes, some of them are good men.

4

Amiracle217 t1_j6pjywk wrote

Yep this happened to me on a dating app once, girl was sending me pics and we were supposed to meet up then boom she’s threatening to send shit to my fam, fortunately I called the bluff, none of them really use social media anyways and tbh I’d rather tell them some wackjob girl tried to extort money out of me than to actually pay someone over that bs, never heard anything about it after that

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yowen2000 t1_j6pjwah wrote

> I do have a lot of trauma that I haven’t worked through.

I'd start doing some work here before considering relationships again.

> But, do we really deserve to be with good, caring, nice partners

You ONE MILLION percent do deserve this, this is not supposed to be some magical thing, what you describe above is like a notch above the bare minimum. Nobody is doing you a "favor" when they do these things, they should be normal in a relationship. If you give these 3 things in your relationship, you should expect them back. Like you said:

> I try to help people as much as I can, and be available for people. I definitely put others before me.

So again, I recommend you do that work. If you are in a better place mentally speaking, you will meet better people.

3

SnowSlider3050 t1_j6pjs32 wrote

Have you ever had feelings for more than one person at a time? If you want to continue your relationship and grow your relationship understand your gf is a human who will have feelings and its not unusual to have feelings for more than one person. Its how we deal with these feelings.

2