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LOL. That isn’t just why it’s used. I post things about my field. Resources. It’s just professional social media. But yeah. I’ve been hit on a lot on LinkedIn. Most are married and saw me/ met me at a conference.

Yes.

Seems like you have it together, financially, and she does not.

I knew about her situation. She was always make me feel that she's so new here and came from small town in Italy. I was aware but nevertheless played the game wrong

Of course, i will

Don’t say anything. Both of you are awful people tho.

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What’s the point of posting this if you’re just going to downvote everyone that disagrees with you?

Sure, go ahead, send it. It won’t do any good. The best case scenario is she blocks you and trashes you to everyone you both know. The worst scenario is the authorities show up with a warrant to search your phone in regards to harassment charges.

This won’t make you look good. In fact, it will make you look decidedly worse, potentially narcissistic, and definitely unhinged.

It’s in 3 weeks haha. The thing is we’ve been hanging out at least twice a week.

The last date was Friday.

We usually do a Friday or Saturday thing at the least. I also wanted to ask her so I can make alternative plans with friends in case she says no.

No. What happens is there’s a sexting exchange, and he’s sending nudes, she’s sending nudes: only thing is she isn’t who she said she was, then blackmails him into sending money or the nudes would get leaked.

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>She told me she wants guys who are obsessed with her.

Oh, my friend, run away. This woman is way more trouble than she is worth...

I understand, thank you

I know it’s hard, but maybe just wait until after her test to ask about the next hangout? When is the exam?

Yep defo. Take some time for yourself and wait until she asks now. No more asking!

Yes you should. If he isn’t a good enough friend to provide some comfort, why are you fucking him?

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She was obviously not honest with you. The silence after your question was LOUD AS FUCK.

I thought about that too, I keep encouraging this kind of behavior by being like this. I'm someone desperate for everything be in good terms :(

>fellas, ladies, is there any salvation here.

Not a bit. You also buried the lede a little; the baby talk thing is weird as hell but it's not even close to being your main issue.

>my boyfriend of almost 2 years (in a few days) called me irrational when i found out he “baby talks” his girl best friend. calling her “her name but in baby voice/text baby🥺💗” well… i told him that is not okay and that i’m making a boundary in our relationship that that is not allowed.

See, if this were the only thing going on with you guys I would say it's bizarre (especially if he claims everyone in his friend group talks to her like this...I suspect that's a lie but even if it's not that's still super weird) but not really something worth having a fight over, and I might have called the boundary excessive. IF this were the only thing. But holy hell, it's not even close to the only thing.

>he told me “this is just as irrational as when you didn’t want me hanging out with ex girl best friend” (he would hangout hours on end, up to ten hours, would drive to see her and not me (granted she lived 30 mins from him and me two hours) and they would text all the time and he would always be texting her while we were together, laughing at here texts.) i told him it made me uncomfortable how much time he spent with this single straight girl. we got into so many fights about it because he told me i was being controlling and to just trust him. (while he’s already lied to me about so much, including topics with girls)

This is all breakup material, every bit of it. At a minimum he was having an emotional affair with this girl if not a physical one, and ANYONE would draw the same line you did so him acting like you're craaaaaaazy for having a problem with it is just him gaslighting you. You weren't being irrational at all. Telling your boyfriend "hey could you stop basically dating this other girl" is the most reasonable boundary anyone has ever had. And yes, they were basically dating.

>anyway, he told me “please dont use boundaries to control me in the future” and then later the next morning i needed reassurance and said “just so we’re on the same page, you won’t be baby talking to her right?” and he rolled his eyes and said “oh so i just have to talk to her like a robot?!” as if there is no other in between option…

This is him trying to make you feel like you're crazy again, when all you asked was that he not be bizarrely affectionate with some other woman. This is a reasonable boundary in the context of all the other shady stuff he's done, but he's trying to make it seem irrational and excessive. Again, he's gaslighting you.

>he lied to me about hanging out with ex best friend (not the baby talk one) and deceived me saying he was with someone else and when i caught him in his lie, he told me “no i told you” and tried to make me believe he told me.

Here yet again we have him getting caught in a lie so he tries to cover by making you think you're crazy or forgetful. As though you'd forget him telling you he was going to hang out with someone you have a problem with.

>he also has lied about going to smoke at random girls (that he just met) dorms in college. she ran into us doing laundry and said “oh hi bf name that was so fun the other night, so and so wanted your snapchat because you guys were getting along!” it took him a few mins to even acknowledge me in the room and introduce me. he told me he lied because he didnt want me to worry. i got so angry and he told me “ oh so im not allowed to have friends who are girls!?!?”

More shady shit, more lies, more trying to make you feel like you're crazy and controlling for not wanting him to go hook up with random women. If you haven't looked up gaslighting yet you may want to because it seems to be your boyfriend's default move when he's caught in a lie, and he tells so many it comes up a LOT.

>always pins the lies on me somehow

Yep, of course he does.

>he also knew i had trauma with the subject of porn (nothing wrong with it, just experienced something in my own life which hurt) and offered to not watch it early in our relationship which i did NOT ask of him. we both promised each other not to though because i thought it was a very kind gesture towards me. a year later he confesses he’s been watching it at least once a week (probably more) and there had been countless times i asked for reassurance “are you watching?” (i was not by the way, kept my promise. i needed the reassurance because of his constant lying so i couldn’t trust he wasnt) and he would say “i pinky promise you im not” well, that hurt to find out all those pinky promises were deceiving. especially because he knows how much they mean to me and that one of the reasons i broke up with my ex was bc they always broke promises. well, he blamed me for how i reacted to him saying this saying “why cant you just trust me now that ive told you everything (every lie)?!?!?” (a week after i found out)

More lying! Pretty much every time he opens his mouth he's either lying to you or blaming you for him lying to you. Or trying to make you think you're crazy for being upset that he's constantly lying to you.

>am i stupid to try and fix this.

You aren't stupid if you try to fix this, just naive and setting yourself up for a lot of misery and heartache. Look, you're 21. You do not need to settle for this miserable-ass pseudo-relationship with a pathological liar who constantly tries to make you doubt yourself. You can do better. ANYONE can do better. Do you really want a relationship where you're the warden and he's the inmate and you've got to be on your guard and following him and searching him every minute of every day because he's constantly trying to get away with something? That sounds exhausting and terrible. Why not just ditch this dumpster fire of a boyfriend and get someone you can actually trust? Just imagine how much easier your life would be without all the lies and constantly being told you're imagining them.

>my dad told me hes gonna cheat.

Your dad is 100% correct, assuming he hasn't started cheating already. I'm pretty sure he has.

You’ll only hurt the person who’s been helping you after your breakup MORE because you’re delaying telling them the truth. You would be leading them on by saying yes to the Valentine’s Day date. Obviously you can’t go on a date with both of them like in the movies.

Just be honest with your friend and say “I like our friendship, and I want it to stay a friendship.” Maybe they asked you on a valentines date because they know you just got out of a long relationship and the holiday could be hard for you. So just be genuine with your feelings.

Ask her when you are together next. Communication is crucial to any good relationship

Judge by actions and actions alone. No one gives a fuck about words or intentions. They are all meaningless in the face of actions.

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