I have this strange observation. If you can make it past 12 years of marriage, it’s likely to last. I can’t count the number of couples that got divorced year 11 or 12. Here’s what I know. Divorce sucks. I had to leave because he became a very angry man so I left for the kids after giving him many chances to get help. Every time the therapist turned the conversation to his issues, he bailed. You have a great foundation. Would you be able to get past this if you worked together to regain that magic that brought you together? If so, fight with everything you have. Divorce sucks even when you have no other choice.

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I still deeply care about you and hope that somehow you accept my apology. I hope we can talk again, but please feel no need to respond to this.

Otherwise, thank you for the past 3 months. You made me so so happy and I looked forward to every text and every time we hung out. Every embrace filled my heart with love in a way you’ll never know. You and XXX are genuinely both amazing people and I wish nothing but the best for the both of you. Her words to me that night were very thoughtful, you have an amazing friend.

All of this needs to go. Leaving this in makes it very apparent that you are apologizing only in the hope that she will get back with you.

It sounds like you are the only person who is confused.

Your wife was cheating on you and has announced to the entire world that she is done with the marriage. And as an outsider it seems like you two would be better off as sex-partners and roommates than you would being committed to each other. And you even wrote that you wo are faking this for your kids.

Personally, I think you need to be a realist. I would look into a non-contested divorce with a written agreement to cohabitate for 3 years pending some major change to your current situation.

Right, like instead of just acknowledging your trauma responses you should actively be working to curb them

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Sounds like a great apology. Acknowledging what you did wrong, without expecting anything from her in return.

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I seriously doubt that a joke was the reason you broke up, but nevertheless i wouldn’t send it. You clearly are apologetic but nothing will come from this and it will seriously mess with your emotions more. Just leave it alone and do better next time

Relationship has to be a two way street. It doesn't sound like you can provide for yourself. You are complaining more like you are losing your nurse rather than your lover. Its up to you to provide a means to take care of yourself and not put it on her.

Absolutely don't give him a second chance.

You can reply to the text if you think that saying something will make you feel better, but I feel like most likely it's just going to end in you being hurt and him trying to guilt trip you into giving him a second chance. Which you should not do.

If you have a text that you want to send that does not need a reply, send it and then block him.

Otherwise just block him.

“Cheater” spay painted on the side?

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Ask her to remove them, UNLESS they have children together or something. That's different. But it's weird that she still has them.

Your missing the point.. Read what I wrote again. I had suspicions and was right.. but I don't know what it means

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Question: You’re certain that this all ended completely 4.5 years ago? Is she still hanging on your husband at events & being sexually inappropriate?

Thank you. I wouldn't expect or even necessarily want a response. I'm still undecided on reaching out and on top of that she doesn't seem active on social media so even if I did message her she might never see it.

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His wanting children is just as valid as her not wanting him. That whole benefits of not having them he probably knows . Also it wasn't a set in stone thing with her. If he wants them and she doesn't the marriage will of course run its course

Hi and thanks for the advice. Yes we share rent. I pay the majority as I earn more money though. That again was decision. She wanted to pay 50 50 but I knew it would result in very little money for her to have after bills

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I suggest asking what you can do