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Posted this up for advice and now im in the middle of this god knows what

I think expecting access to someone’s phone and/or laptop is a red flag. People are allowed privacy, even in relationships. Him not allowing you access to either isn’t ringing alarm bells.

At this point, you have nothing. No evidence, just a feeling. You could either talk to him or just keep an eye on things and see how they pan out.

This is a ridiculous thing to have on TV while working, it's exactly conducive to a professional setting, which is what your home is during working hours. He is the outlier here, not you. He can get a tablet + headphones to get the visuals+sounds he needs to be productive.

She's moving in one month. Put your head down, stop giving in to her demands, leave her shit where she leaves it, don't clean up after her, and keep track of your kitty.

If you don’t get along with her, then why is she still your friend?

Seems odd he just decided to do this 1 time. I'd worry about the other sent out nudes you know nothing about. I'm sorry you're dealing with this. There's a saying. For every rat you see, there are many more hiding in the woodwork.

I'm having fun.

This is the first time in my life I saw someone calling a single girl being touched by a crush "an incident".

That's bizarre and I'm all for it.

Then how can he hear the tv?

I am curious of what you mean by persistence? I didn't persist on anything, like I said I didn't have any illusions and I didn't want her to feel narrowed by it or intruding. I just told her the last week because I thought it actually is kind of of advantage if you tell someone about it so you can work on why this is occuring or deal with how to cope with it, which I had hoped for. I didn't try to make her laugh with intention. She just did. She started acting "different" from that day on. And she wasn't stressed because of me, her job was taking a toll on her, because she had to do it all by herself and maybe something was going on in her private life?

There was another patient openly talking about her feelings with her therapist. There were more people than just me who had a crush on one of their doctors or therapists.. and they either were allowed to be in awe or talked it out with their therapist and their "caretaker" handled it all really professional.

Thanks for answering :)

Why on earth would she break up with me over my previous post?????????

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Well considering your roommate is moving out and you’ve all ready started keeping your stuff in your room all that’s left to do is completely stop engaging or talking to her and simply pretend she’s not there. No need to add any drama to this situation by putting dirty dishes in her bed.

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id rather the porn than a secret relationship haha. thank you

Break up? Say goodbye? Throw away? Send back to your nanny?

Pick any. Or use Google, ffs.

Dude can you maybe calm down

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You can stay where you are and say « guys please - this isn’t getting solved so can we please drop it ». Was the other guys’ attitude toward you aggressive at all ? You said they peppered you with questions. Is that what your BF reacted to?

The more i read your comments and turn this over and over in my head the more i feel like ive made a mistake, shouldve probably left it alone. I wouldnt have proposed to this woman if i really didnt feel like i could trust her, and if anything you guys are right she probably just trying to save herself a frustrating conversation since she knows how i am and how possessive my nature can be. Feel like i learned something nevertheless so thanks yall. Lets try and work on being less insecure and more encouraging about bouts of honesty, responding the right way and having a sense of perspective.

You have nothing conclusive. So at this point, all you can do is keep an eye on it. Not being allowed to use his phone or computer is a possible sign, but that's it: possible, he could just be a private person or a person with a shitload of porn. Who knows, lol.

I'm sorry....what does boot you out mean?

You sound like anxious attachment. I’d work on that as this is your biggest issue.

He told you “You need to stop overthinking things” and now you’re going “Idk what to think about this”. Of course you don’t because there’s nothing to think about. Stop making problems where they’re aren’t any.

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