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Great. You’re learning about cat fishing. Keep up the homework.

I bet “she” also posts stuff like “hey I’m out of gas can anyone spot me a $20 to see my kids”

I don't know about the situation and I don't mean to make you panic. But a lot of the time when someone is talking to someone else in maybe a capacity they shouldn't, they do tend to say "you're my only love and she/he knows about you and they've have a partner". Sometimes it's completely true and innocent. But all the other times, it's not. I don't know why he went behind your back. Also, knowing about each others partners doesn't mean shxt to some people. Some enjoy the right under their partners noses/doing the forbidden. Idk. I hope it's not that. Good luck. But if you get any more red flags don't ignore them and don't waste your time.

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At 26 he’s it way up high in the military, and he wouldn’t have time to text you all day. What is his job in the military?

I also don’t know how to talk to him, he just shuts down and stays quite and that makes me nervous

He says he spends a lot? On what? He needs to budget.

How can I go about this with him? I know when I told him I can't move in right now, he said he can't wait for me any longer, at the same time the "altimatum" was the first time I've ever heard this from him. I feel under pressure since i only have 2 months to figure it out wich is a big step/stroll on alot of stuff.

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I make way more than he does and my rent is very high. He says he spends a lot and doesn’t get to save anything.

Don't give in to ultimatums, it sets a precedent. He is threatening to end your relationship if you don't do what he wants. That does not sound like love, it sounds like manipulation and coercion.

Do not let him dictate terms to you. A relationship is supposed to be a partnership. He has no right to control you so that he doesn't have to deal with financial hardship. He can find a studio apartment or a trailer to rent.

Yes, cake and eat it too. Nail on the head

He's emotionally cheating with a scammer, which makes him unfaithful AND a dumbass.

Alright the first half, you clearly need to talk to him. The second half, he’s a bum. You’re taking care of a bum. No wonder he’s lazy in bed, he’s lazy throughout. He isn’t contributing to rent? Does he makes pennies compared to you?

Voices can be altered to sound like anyone. But she’s so amazing because it’s her job. These scammers know exactly what to say to reel them in. Look how fast she got him to send her money. The first time he doesn’t send money, she will change and won’t be so wonderful. Of course he doesn’t give you money because you aren’t a professional thief. But at this point he cares more about her than you. Get out of this mess. Find someone who does care about you and isn’t gullible. You can try to talk to him and ask him to see what happens if he doesn’t give her money, but he might be a lost cause. People have sold their houses and given all the money to scammers. You’d be surprised how prevalent it is. I’m sorry for you and sorry for your boyfriend, but there is someone better for you out there.

You have to tell him, this is a big deal and you both should be in the same page if you both want to be happy. That way at least he can make informed decisions.

Welcome to /r/relationship_advice. Please make sure you read our rules here. We'd like to take this time to remind users that:

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Either go 50/50 which is still not a good idea or let him go he wants you to pay his bills he can't afford. This is not a good relationship!

It might mean she wants to ear her cake and have it too. With current arrangement she doesn't need with your sexual compatibility issues while having you there in her life.

I think you shouldn't let this situation last too long. At some point you need push her to make decision whether she wants to get back or stay apart. If she would wish to stay apart you should distance yourself so that you can get over her and eventually find a serious partner for you.

But where is the extra $1000 coming from? Are you not going to give up your place? Presumably you’re paying at least $500 for your current place