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Well $500 a month wouldn’t get you a studio apartment in the ghetto here. it would be in the $1,000 range and add another $200 for utilities. For a small apartment.

They wouldn’t leave. There is no question.

This is more of what would you do personally kind of thing.

There is no doubt they would agree to pay and stay. The question is more of as a son is it right?

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You should get a divorce

You know exactly what to do. I hope writing it all out was the step you needed to start looking out for yourself.

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Not all therapists understand nonmonogamy, if op costs to do this route they should look for a therapist with experience with nonmonogamous couples. I've had an open marriage for a long time.

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If your wife is worried about paperwork, she needs to know that this name change will follow your daughter around (assuming you live in the US). Any time you do anything “official” like buy a house or get a passport, you have to to list other names you have gone by. In many states parents are require to list their birth name on the new baby’s birth certificate. It will get even more cumbersome if your daughter changes her name again due to marriage or something else.

Married 20+, open about a decade

Sexual incompatibly is one of the most generous reasons a spouse can offer to open a marriage. She loves you enough to want you to have hot she doesn't give you. Understand how selfless that is of her. My advice is to take it slow, give your wife time to make sure she's ok with this. Talk to each other about it as much as possible and before you progress to me levels.

>how does a married man even find partners who would be okay with this dynamic?

You make a profile on OkCupid, it allows you to state you are married and nonmonogamous. If you don't know how to make a dating profile read up on it, there are a few subs here that will give feedback on your profile. Be prepared to take some time to find someone. My gf has success on FB dating as does her husband but I've never used it so I can't tell you firsthand.

No one person can fulfill all of someone else's needs, let alone wants, and think how much pressure that is to put on a person. Ethical nonmonogamy fixes that. Here's a non sexual example. My gf's husband is getting them dance lessons for her birthday. I was happy because I hate to dance.

The spending the night thing alone with your bf I can understand how it makes you feel uneasy after Emily did what she did. Why not ask if she's going to stay the night, you do as well? He shouldn't have a problem with that if nothing is going on between them.

DNA test.

You can ask. But I would recommend setting it a year later, to give them time to put their things in order and to find another place. When you invited them, it was an open invitation, it seems.

You need to talk through all of this with a trusted friend.

His mother did not die and he never had any intention of going to Boston. He is a liar, he probably isn't in the military, and he may not even be a man. You need to stop.

I think the most sensible thing for you to do would be to return to the Netherlands.

Find someone to date that you know in person.

cheaters always cheat

you share your update that your relationship with your husband ended in divorce

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It is perfectly reasonable to want a physically intimate relationship - especially at your age. This incompatibility will lead to built up resentment, and your relationship will suffer.

Everyone has needs. If shes unwilling or unable to meet your needs, you only have two options: have a serious heart-to-heart conversation and come up with a plan to fix it, or break up now.

If she does not recognize her lack of libido as a problem and says "its just who I am" or "I'm basically asexual" or anything to that effect - she will not try to change. If she recognizes it as a serious problem and wants to take steps to improve, then you have a chance. Be open to making your own changes to increase her sexual desire.

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His mother just died and his brain and emotions will be all over the place. You are a pretty crappy girlfriend because you should be supporting him during this difficult time but you're making this all about you and money. Stop being confrontational and start being more supportive.

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