Recent comments in /f/relationship_advice

Web822 t1_j2e41yi wrote

now i have to ask

Are you sure your boyfriend is cheating on her?

this relationship may have been going on for a long time and the promotion you think her deserve in career may be the result of her relationship with your boss.

she is not a nice person and you are supporting cheating by pretending to be a bystander.

please find the evidence, inform hr. Both affect the lives of other people at work, and they may threaten the social lives of other people in the future.

the rest is up to your conscience, you can find excuses and watch silently.

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[deleted] OP t1_j2e3qes wrote

I can’t disagree with you and all that is why I’m so worried. And I hadn’t said in my post but her parents would be horrified by this. I don’t know about therapy though or how to access it. I don’t think it’s really that common here (UK). I might be wrong and will try and look but I can’t drag her there.

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maddawg992 OP t1_j2e3orj wrote

I can maintain a relationship with my brother and nephews (sorta) without her. She sometimes when she’s upset will isolate herself and make her boys stay in her room with her but my 14yo nephew just got a cellphone so I can be in contact with him that way!

Update: she blocked everyone in my brothers family. Aunts, uncles, cousins, and our parents. Weirdly she did not block my friends from home she has gone out with when I’m home

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lifewith6cats t1_j2e3iwp wrote

You can't control how other people will respond. Even without the depression she would likely take the break-up badly because no parent wants to see their child in pain. Plus she was probably relying on you to care for him once they are no longer able. Don't tell her about the break-up until after you have done it, that wouldn't be fair to your bf to find out from his mother that she knew. And seriously think about blocking all communication after the break-up so that they can't manipulate you back into a relationship. Plus it would give them false hope that you might change your mind. Good luck

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itsallminenow t1_j2e3ely wrote

I would say that he has exhausted your trust in him, which is a glass support that once broken cannot easily be reconstructed. I presume you've pointed out to him that he has no revealed that your boundaries are obstructions to be worked around, rather than actual boundaries? Because his dishonesty is exactly that, a refusal to accept a boundary and see it as an obstruction that needs action to circumvent.

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cdnkevin t1_j2e3bgo wrote

Reintroduce yourself to your right/left hand, get one of those Fleshlight or similar toys, or take up running (when you feel urges go for a run).

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Consistent_Patient88 t1_j2e34h7 wrote

It’s been 8 years so I think it’s safe to say there’s something there and that’s the reason why he doesn’t want you both mixing with each other. If he’s not prepared to fix the situation, then end it. It’s so odd that 8 years down the line and he’s still trying to keep you separated from her. Red flags.

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