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To be honest, I'd approach this from two angles.

The first, future goals. What is most important to you? When would you like to retire? What are some bucket list items that would require money down the line? What are some major expenses you see coming up (down payment, car, big vacation etc.)in the next 5-10 years? What would you need to guard against emergencies? I would then put a dollar value on each of these goals and work backwards to see exactly how much I need to save today. This helps minimise anxiety that often comes with non-specific saving, whether the amount will be enough or not.

The second part is figuring out what's important to you today. What brings you true joy and happiness? Contrary to some of the advice in this thread, I don't think spending for its own sake is healthy. But spending to add lasting value to your life is. And the goal then would be to be as frugal as possible in areas of your life that matter less so than you can direct your spending to those areas that bring you the most lasting fulfilment and joy.

A couple of book recommendations: The Psychology of Money (Morgan Housel) and Your Money or your Life (Vicki Robin).

The Southbay of Southern California is the greatest place on the planet. Climate, access to restaurants/travel, the ocean, and the people are nice.

it’s one of the most expensive places on the planet for that reason. I grew up there, and have moved around the country in my adult life. It doesn’t get better.

that being said, I value the weather, access to entertainment/restaurants, and the beach a lot when I consider where i want to live.

Yeah, that's the danger. For me, I've been looking at a new phone. I've been rocking very old used phones since about 2016 because paying more than 1000 bucks for a phone is CRAZY to me. Shit, paying more than 400 bucks seems to high to me.

But there are some new phones on the market that have some features that really would make working on the device easier, and even the older models of these newer phones are over 1000 dollars for a good one, then add the storage I need, and I'm in the new phone territory anyway ...

I don't want to spend that kind of money on a new phone. It's a freaking phone! They literally cost like 300 bucks to make. But this is how the industry prices, and it is a tool that I need and can afford to buy... ...it just stings a lot knowing what the profit margins are like...

Deferring payment, and being able to collect some interest by leaving near 3000 dollars in investments, instead of paying that all at once, and taking advantage of inflation devaluing the price of the device over almost 3 years effectively makes the price cheaper...

But this normalizes paying three thousand fucking dollars for a device that cost 1/10th that to make, which I don't want to do.

I wish the second hand market was more reasonable... I wish the primary market was more reasonable... but I don't really have a choice, because I use my phone literally as a computer instead of using a laptop when I'm out and about.

Why would you take out another loan for $30,000 if you have the cash to pay? That seems nuts to me

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You sure you need to go back to school? If you can code, apply for an entry level position. If you can’t code start learning on your own time. If you don’t want to write code, look into product management, program management and sales engineering. There are lots of ways to use your existing degree to get a different job in tech.

Every time I go to buy something and I see an offer from Affirm at 0% interest I always take it.

Their "game" is obviously they're hoping a payment bounces and they can charge me a bunch of interest. But in my personal experience, I've noticed usually the 0% payment option pushes me over the edge to make the purchase. Just recently I needed a new belt and went belt shopping. I found one I liked. While browsing the website I also saw a new wallet I liked. I want a new wallet, but I could wait a couple of months before buying one. But when I saw I could make payments over a few months at 0% I just went ahead and bought the wallet too. So they got me to spend twice as much as I would have otherwise.

I used to be this way! I overcame it when I broke down my expenses and earnings and laid it all out to see. The things I wanted to "splurge" on came out to such a small fraction and didn't affect anything that it was more of a headache living without it and thinking about it, than just buying it, this weighted thinking got me to start spending.

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You only have 1 life to live, don't live it so shitty. As long as you're meeting your financial goals and are well aware of the underlying costs of a purchase (like opportunity costs, maintenance, etc.) break down and plan out that balance yourself.

It’s pretty normal when you get a apartment your often asked to pay for the first and last months rent.

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One could always add a bit of that to help diversify, the expense ratio's certainly low enough.

Don’t touch the current contributions in 401k or you’ll get hit with penalties. Just lower your future contributions a bit if need be to contribute to roth ira. Contribute at least enough to the 401k to get their full match.

Yes.. started reading…

Very helpful thank you

Hey OP, sounds like you're new to this stuff. Lot of good comments here already, so I'm going to add one thing I didn't see.

If you use a check, put your unit's address (and unit #) in your comment line. Include which month it's for as well. All checks are usually scanned by banks, and so it can be used for your records.

Keeping records can help you in the long run! I had a place send me an eviction notice (no other communication) for "non-payment". When I called and said I had the receipt for that month their reaction was priceless! Your landlord will rarely help you, so help yourself. GL out there.

I had to stop working due to my pregnancy being absolutely horrific. Something I did was looked into “on call” jobs to work a few days a month or so when I was well.

If you are not married, I would recommend she applies for medicaid, ebt, and WIC. These things have been very helpful for me personally. I think she may qualify for medicaid even if you two are married depending on the state and circumstances so no harm in applying.

If she gets insurance through her job & does not qualify for medicaid, you can get COBRA.

At your current tax bracket traditional is the way to go if you will be at a lower tax bracket at retirement. Roth only benefits if you are paying low taxes now or if will be a higher tax bracket in retirement. If it’s the same the math has it as a wash/equal.

South Dakota is an equitable distribution state, and assets acquired both during and prior to the marriage can be subject to division following divorce. Some factors considered by South Dakota courts in a property division case include non-monetary contributions and economic misconduct

you may have paid 15-15 then will owe the prorated amount for next month, so only 250, not $250 plus 600 next month. I had a company do this once

A HYSA is a great idea. But avoid Citibank - they have a tendency to freeze your account and withhold your money for many, many months.

A Money Market Fund and/or T Bills at a brokerage are also great options.

OP, I’m in Orange County as well. Kinda in a similar boat, living at home and saving lots of money. If I were to move out, I would strongly consider a roommate so you don’t have to pay $2k+/mo. The rental market here is expensive and you pay a huge premium for 1 bed units. Can’t blame you for not wanting a roommate though.

Think about it this way - you’re maxing out your IRA and contributing a good amount to your 401k, assuming this continues for the next few decades you’ll be well set up in retirement in your 50s or 60s. Do you only wanna go vacation then when you’re old and joints hurt?

If you have money saved up for vacations or other leisure’s, use it. No need to feel guilty about it, if you want something nice get it, if you want to vacation then you should. Saving money isn’t just about having it for the future, but also having some to enjoy in the current moment.

for tax advantaged accounts i just do vanguard TDF fund now that they have lowered the ER to 0.08. quite literally the best set it and forget it option now.