Recent comments in /f/nottheonion
whooo_me t1_jaij0u2 wrote
Reply to Amsterdam murder suspect caught with bag of meat at Lisbon Airport, fueling cannibal rumor by NinjaElectricMeteor
"Booking for one, or two?
- Two. No... one!
"Got you!"
DCErik t1_jaiitij wrote
'Poorly educated racism/treason enjoyers suck at driving' is supposed to be satire of some kind?
DamnBunny t1_jaiirhp wrote
Reply to Ric Flair to be the face of cannabis products for erectile dysfunction from Mike Tyson's weed company by WamBlamLufba
r/UpliftingNews
ThatMangoAteMyBaby t1_jaiiqz8 wrote
Reply to Former Navy pilot testifies that he witnessed UFOs with his ‘own eyes', calls on Biden to investigate by DangerStranger138
FOX news… say no more.
Heywhatsupitsmeguys t1_jaiik36 wrote
fondledbydolphins t1_jaihokf wrote
Fuck is wrong with people these days? A guy can't even walk around with his daily carry mummy anymore without someone sticking their nose in his business.
rednazgo t1_jaihe2k wrote
Reply to comment by Van_GOOOOOUGH in Amsterdam murder suspect caught with bag of meat at Lisbon Airport, fueling cannibal rumor by NinjaElectricMeteor
You take one bite of delicious human meat, and no other meat every satisfies you again
SilasX t1_jaihcaw wrote
Reply to comment by Mrs_Magooo in Police warn people not to engage with a man dressed as the Cookie Monster due to his history of 'troublesome behavior' by MillisaIsCool
“Don’t you sheep realize that Big Ag has been on a century-long campaign to convince Americans there’s nothing wrong with heavy consumption of sugars?!?”
‘Cookie Monster, you’re not you when you’re hungry. Have a snickers.’
“C is for cookie and that’s good enough for me!”
Total-Caterpillar-21 t1_jaih858 wrote
Reply to Heinz to give new boat to man who survived on ketchup while lost at sea by AlephNaughtPlusOne
Did anyone ask if he maybe is t in a rush to get back on a boat any time soon?
HypnoSmoke t1_jaigk4v wrote
Reply to comment by KuhLealKhaos in Amsterdam murder suspect caught with bag of meat at Lisbon Airport, fueling cannibal rumor by NinjaElectricMeteor
That's his name? He had to have changed it to that..
DisgruntledDiggit t1_jaifjlq wrote
Reply to Ric Flair to be the face of cannabis products for erectile dysfunction from Mike Tyson's weed company by WamBlamLufba
Weed FOR ED?
Does nobody else get THC induced ED? I call it trading wood for weed.
TheButcherOfBaklava t1_jaifenk wrote
Reply to comment by Unnoble_Savage in Man found carrying mummy in a food delivery bag in Peru by kangarooturd
Dammit. I was going to eat that mummy!
Gloomy_Narwhal_719 t1_jaifaif wrote
Reply to Nebraska cheerleader competes alone at state competition after squad backs out: 'Proud of myself' by geekman20
I heard this story in church from her Grandparents - YOU GO GIRL!
Content_Forever_1177 t1_jaif2qr wrote
Reply to Ric Flair to be the face of cannabis products for erectile dysfunction from Mike Tyson's weed company by WamBlamLufba
This is what I come to this subreddit for
killerbee2319 t1_jaidtug wrote
Reply to comment by ZogNowak in Former Navy pilot testifies that he witnessed UFOs with his ‘own eyes', calls on Biden to investigate by DangerStranger138
Probably just checking up on their space fence to make sure we can't get out..
Voidbearer2kn17 t1_jaidhek wrote
Reply to Ric Flair to be the face of cannabis products for erectile dysfunction from Mike Tyson's weed company by WamBlamLufba
Advertising that writes itself.
Unnoble_Savage t1_jaidg2s wrote
Zevulon the Great, he's teriyaki style
Elmodogg t1_jaidcdc wrote
We are going to be out there next week. Hope the weather gets better.
Content_Forever_1177 t1_jaidbxf wrote
This is good news
Zenla t1_jaicpvh wrote
Reply to comment by blahbleh112233 in Nebraska cheerleader competes alone at state competition after squad backs out: 'Proud of myself' by geekman20
I don't actually know why the title says that they backed out when the article itself says that they couldn't make it to the competition.
Zxcc24 t1_jaicpv5 wrote
ZealousidealClub4119 t1_jaicgkk wrote
Reply to comment by kangarooturd in Man found carrying mummy in a food delivery bag in Peru by kangarooturd
Inca jerky
imll99 t1_jaicfka wrote
Reply to comment by Defiant-Peace-493 in Libraries Attract More Visitors Than Movie Theaters Among Americans:2019 by tonymarkk
I'm an avid moviegoer, but I love libraries more than most other places on the planet, so this was a welcome surprise for me.
WickieTheHippie t1_jaic1eg wrote
Reply to Former Navy pilot testifies that he witnessed UFOs with his ‘own eyes', calls on Biden to investigate by DangerStranger138
Once someone finds out what a UFO is, it's not gonna be a UFO anymore.
EmotionalDouble5610 t1_jaij7s6 wrote
Reply to comment by Elmodogg in Tourists expecting San Diego sunshine arrive as next storm moves in by McPokeFace
If the wind patterns hold it'll likely be in Arizona-Mexico-New Mexico by next week. These days you definitely need to monitor the weather patterns, especially if you aren't used to severe weather