Recent comments in /f/Jokes
[deleted] t1_je2vo1f wrote
Reply to comment by FancyAlligator in Little Johnny's parents wanted to have some "alone time" together... by SexySwedishSpy
[deleted]
NoneReciprocating t1_je2vm2f wrote
I once witnessed at a traffic stop in a third world country, twelve people getting out of a tiny cab. Turns out a whole football team plus coach were on the way to a game and decided to share a ride.
karma_dumpster t1_je2vfsb wrote
Reply to comment by [deleted] in What’s the difference between a lentil and a chickpea? by iverson79
This is the correct joke
maynardstaint t1_je2vebv wrote
Reply to comment by RoLaAus in What’s 14 inches and hangs in front of an asshole? by Less_Geologist_4004
Dude, get your head out of your ass. The Qanon shaman confessed, plead guilty and gave a video statement. Stop with the fucking conspiracies. THEY DID IT. THEYCOMMITED EVERY CRIME THEY ARE ACCUSED OF.
[deleted] t1_je2v2iv wrote
[removed]
[deleted] t1_je2v0x8 wrote
[removed]
[deleted] t1_je2u5rg wrote
[removed]
sinclair315 t1_je2u5e2 wrote
it is supposed to be garbanzo bean, ya dangus
RoLaAus t1_je2u1k4 wrote
Reply to comment by HarryHacker42 in What’s 14 inches and hangs in front of an asshole? by Less_Geologist_4004
And neither was the "mostly peaceful" riots where a police pricing was burnt down and they tried to keep the cops inside!
NO cops died directly from the Jan 6th protest, and so ehow .yateriously multiple cops were suicided (and none committed suicide during the "summer of love", come on man! Those cops were Clintoned and were gon a spill the beans about all the comms that were "accidebtally" destroyed that day!
Smashed windows - BIG F*&%ING DEAL! There was multiple BILLIONS worth of damages done by those "mostly peaceful" RIOTS! AND COPS WERE KILLED DURING THEM TOO!
rockyPK t1_je2twub wrote
Reply to comment by MoistCity530 in Never literally taking cooking instructions… by Phippsy771
And an oxygen mask
biliaryOrchil704 t1_je2tpj1 wrote
A time loop?
unipolarStore471 t1_je2tlra wrote
What's the difference between a hormone and a vitamin?
I've never made a vitamin.
[deleted] t1_je2taai wrote
[removed]
RoLaAus t1_je2t4s0 wrote
Reply to comment by maynardstaint in What’s 14 inches and hangs in front of an asshole? by Less_Geologist_4004
And again, none of then had dreams, most were let in and even the "q anon shaman" was escorted around by cops (tried to open a locked door then directed him to an alternate route - making them co-conspirators OR making it entrapment... which was it?)
[deleted] t1_je2sqaq wrote
Reply to Someone stole my mood ring. by a_pinch_of_sarcasm
[removed]
IAmEggsOk t1_je2sfdi wrote
Reply to comment by KarmicComic12334 in Teacher asked the class, by KarmicComic12334
re-read
/s, don’t come at me plz, I’m only kidding
Bettercram81 t1_je2s3x6 wrote
Reply to Someone stole my mood ring. by a_pinch_of_sarcasm
I’ll have to tell my wife this joke. She’ll love it. She’ll giggle, look lovingly into my eyes, and regret the day she left me and took custody of my children.
Thanks!
ShakeForProtein t1_je2rhmd wrote
You had it easy mate, I had to stand in boiling water.
harmlessbreakage954 t1_je2rcyw wrote
Reply to Someone stole my mood ring. by a_pinch_of_sarcasm
My girlfriend used to have a mood ring,
when she was happy it was a beautiful shade of green.
When she was sad it was a beautiful deep blue.
And when she was angry it’d leave a bright red mark of my face.
BlightFantasy3467 t1_je2qoaf wrote
Reply to comment by fuqdisshite in Little Johnny's parents wanted to have some "alone time" together... by SexySwedishSpy
Here's a better one
[deleted] t1_je2qg1g wrote
[deleted]
Mean-Top9087 t1_je2pw8y wrote
Whip until stiff.
DrachenDad t1_je2pbni wrote
Reply to comment by MinisculeInformant in [ Removed by Reddit ] by noOne000Br
>There are four third-person singular pronouns: he, she, it, and they.
Only one is gendered, she. He loosely, don't forget that any gender specific wording attributed to a penis haver is actually for all humans apart from the word male.
The_Fat_Man_Jams t1_je2ojtb wrote
Reply to Have you ever smelled moth balls? by OMP159
Their tiny legs tickle my nose.
AmainRecopy t1_je2w3l2 wrote
Reply to A boiled egg in the morning... by TheBronsXX
it took me longer than eggspected to get this joke