Recent comments in /f/Jokes
BusinessImpossible68 t1_jdx2sin wrote
Reply to Home Covid Test. by Buddy2269
I take covid tests 7 times a day, my poop always smells the same.
E420CDI t1_jdx2d20 wrote
Reply to comment by militaryCoo in At the bar last night, a woman got her nipple pierced right in front of me by faithless_serene
One hundred and EIIIIIIGGGHHHTTTTTYYYYYYY
cloudyTurin963 t1_jdx0iwg wrote
Reply to The Chili lover by Remarkable-Youth-504
A big Texan cowboy stopped at a local restaurant following a day of drinking and roaming around in Mexico. While sipping his tequila, he noticed a sizzling, scrumptious looking platter being served at the next table. Not only did it look good, but the smell was wonderful..
He asked the waiter, ‟What is that you just served?” The waiter replied, ‟Ah Senor, you have excellent taste! Those are bull’s testicles from the bullfight this morning. A delicacy!”
The cowboy, undaunted, said, ‟What the heck, I am on vacation, I’ll have some!” The waiter replied, ‟I am so sorry Senor. There is only one serving per day because there is only one bullfight each morning. If you place your order now, we’ll be sure to save you this delicacy for tomorrow”
The cowboy placed the order and the next evening he was served the one and only special delicacy of the day. After a few bites, and inspecting the contents of his platter, he called to the waiter and said, ‟These are delicious, but they are much smaller than the ones I saw you serve yesterday”
The waiter shrugged his shoulders and replied, ‟Si, Senor ... sometimes the bull wins.”
Iz-kan-reddit t1_jdwzhpd wrote
Reply to comment by theplutosys in At the bar last night, a woman got her nipple pierced right in front of me by faithless_serene
It was a play on "what's a computer?"
Many would say that the term came from the purple copies that smelled oh so good back in the old days.
Not my best work.
favoritecumbria586 t1_jdwz5ld wrote
Reply to The Chili lover by Remarkable-Youth-504
Upvote for a joke I've never heard before
Rikudou_Sage t1_jdwyvvy wrote
Reply to comment by Iz-kan-reddit in At the bar last night, a woman got her nipple pierced right in front of me by faithless_serene
It's a Pokemon, son.
Rough_love_ t1_jdwyfqc wrote
Reply to The Chili lover by Remarkable-Youth-504
How do you measure how heavy a red hot chili pepper is?
Give it a weigh, give it a weigh, give it a weigh now.
mniemerg t1_jdwybev wrote
Reply to The Chili lover by Remarkable-Youth-504
thanks, I hate it
alex0166 t1_jdwx9pa wrote
Reply to At the bar last night, a woman got her nipple pierced right in front of me by faithless_serene
I suck at women's nipples!
hairybogwoppit t1_jdwx0vm wrote
Reply to The rectum stretcher by Siosal01
I couldn't be arsed to read till the end, a bummer as i 'll never know if it was funny.
theplutosys t1_jdwww16 wrote
Reply to comment by Iz-kan-reddit in At the bar last night, a woman got her nipple pierced right in front of me by faithless_serene
I don’t get what you are asking. The definition of ditto?
peter_the_martian t1_jdww36w wrote
Reply to The rectum stretcher by Siosal01
A 62 in a 55? Cop’s an asshole
peter_the_martian t1_jdwvnuc wrote
My wife had sex with thirteen different pastry chefs.
She calls it the baker’s dozen.
Iz-kan-reddit t1_jdwuu6d wrote
Reply to comment by theplutosys in At the bar last night, a woman got her nipple pierced right in front of me by faithless_serene
Hey, you're the one that used the term.
theplutosys t1_jdwtwi3 wrote
Reply to comment by Iz-kan-reddit in At the bar last night, a woman got her nipple pierced right in front of me by faithless_serene
?
hairybogwoppit t1_jdws7bx wrote
And she said, oh yes it is fucking working out
UnburnedFire t1_jdwpgcy wrote
Reply to At the bar last night, a woman got her nipple pierced right in front of me by faithless_serene
Well now you are sucking on pierced nipples
[deleted] t1_jdwn1np wrote
Reply to comment by NDodma01 in An ape’s favourite music group is obviously The Monkeys. What is their next favourite? by Spocks-Nephew
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Iz-kan-reddit t1_jdwmkm4 wrote
Reply to comment by theplutosys in At the bar last night, a woman got her nipple pierced right in front of me by faithless_serene
Grandpa, what's a ditto?
hansCT t1_jdwmfti wrote
Reply to comment by padremiadre in At the border, a man drives up on his bicycle with a sack on the luggage rack. by pulp_thilo
literally ancient
see Mullah Nasruddin, smuggling donkeys
NDodma01 t1_jdwlmd4 wrote
Reply to comment by Spocks-Nephew in An ape’s favourite music group is obviously The Monkeys. What is their next favourite? by Spocks-Nephew
Takes a bow
[deleted] t1_jdwllev wrote
Reply to comment by WheeeeeThePeople in I walked in on my wife having sex with her gym trainer... by mrtipbull
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EduArt_Paper t1_jdwlhxx wrote
Looks like she's lifting more than just weights in the gym.
Browncoat64 t1_jdwlfg8 wrote
Reply to comment by Hisbeefiness in Guy and a Girl on a first date. by Buddy2269
With a warmer
barney_trumpleton t1_jdx2vjo wrote
Reply to comment by Mobiasstriptease in At the bar last night, a woman got her nipple pierced right in front of me by faithless_serene
You may need more context, as an American. In professional darts in the UK, when someone throws 180, the crowd go wild and the announcer embellishes the call like he's announcing a boxer making a grand entrance. This has made its way into the public zeitgeist, where amateur comedians will scream "ooooooone hundred and eighhhhhhty!!" at random intervals throughout a game of darts.
https://youtu.be/aea939Cxs5w