Recent comments in /f/Jokes
stankmastaflex t1_jdkhqz0 wrote
Reply to comment by sherriffflood in I bought two Rottweilers and named them Rolex and Omega by Round-Watch-8228
Those are amateur numbers.
JB_Newman t1_jdkhbv7 wrote
Reply to I started dating a blind girl. by DooleyMTV
I see what you did there. Shame she didn't
mojojojojo369 t1_jdkhbck wrote
Reply to My wife was just in a minor accident. She's told the police that the man she hit was on his phone and drinking a Coke at the time by Gil-Gandel
My wife hit some kids who were jay walking…
with a baseball bat
DaFunkyCake t1_jdkh7kf wrote
Reply to comment by Abe_Rudda in I just invented a car that only moves when the driver is silent. by WarlikeDisco
Well, I guess some think that, but what you don't know can kill you. You believe these evolutionists?: They say, humans have been around for hundreds of thousands of years? They say, the human brain-sized doubled 40000 years ago? I think contrary to them the stage was set before you got to the play. Be prudent to prophesy. God wanted to know who thought being a good person is important.
DaFunkyCake t1_jdkggae wrote
Reply to comment by Any-Faithlessness351 in There has been much said and sung about the "Eye Of The Tiger", but how come no one ever talks about the other four letters? by LOHare
And, without faith you cannot please God. Read Hebrews 11:1 & 6. No, force would mean I make you follow my beliefs, or impose a law restricting your freedoms when you violate them; I myself, have done no such thing.
Sjonnie_Spain t1_jdkffjd wrote
Reply to comment by FlashpointJ24 in My wife was just in a minor accident. She's told the police that the man she hit was on his phone and drinking a Coke at the time by Gil-Gandel
Honey, I've got good news and I've got bad news..
Good news is the airbags work
ohbyerly t1_jdkfaqu wrote
Ugh. It’s not sustainable, there’s no way they would survive out in the wild after. I’m sorry, it just really gets a rise out of me.
unripenedboyparts t1_jdkerq7 wrote
Reply to I started dating a blind girl. by DooleyMTV
God, that is dark grim.
unripenedboyparts t1_jdke36h wrote
Reply to comment by Waitsfornoone in My wife was just in a minor accident. She's told the police that the man she hit was on his phone and drinking a Coke at the time by Gil-Gandel
Adults by birth, children by choice.
ZaphodBeeblebrox2019 t1_jdkd7ic wrote
Reply to comment by Blackswordsman8899 in My wife was just in a minor accident. She's told the police that the man she hit was on his phone and drinking a Coke at the time by Gil-Gandel
That’s what the Judge said …
As for the Cop, not to mention the Chief, they aren’t Officers anymore!
Blackswordsman8899 t1_jdkbxhb wrote
Reply to comment by ZaphodBeeblebrox2019 in My wife was just in a minor accident. She's told the police that the man she hit was on his phone and drinking a Coke at the time by Gil-Gandel
Were they stupid? That’s private personal property. They can do damn near anything there.
Kenlaboss t1_jdkb8as wrote
Reply to comment by BecauseItAmusesMe in I gave a woman my umbrella yesterday by h3llofaRide
No, but I've heard that it's raining men.
kevster013 t1_jdkaxkv wrote
Reply to comment by Matiaan in I went to the zoo today and there were 2 baguettes in a cage by MrRickSter
The Australian movie industry is offended by this remark. 😊
ZaphodBeeblebrox2019 t1_jdk8pqx wrote
Reply to comment by Waitsfornoone in My wife was just in a minor accident. She's told the police that the man she hit was on his phone and drinking a Coke at the time by Gil-Gandel
Hers, right on her own front stoop …
And even more importantly, he wasn’t even wearing a condom!
Waitsfornoone t1_jdk8gb7 wrote
Reply to comment by [deleted] in My wife was just in a minor accident. She's told the police that the man she hit was on his phone and drinking a Coke at the time by Gil-Gandel
Still better than being a minor on purpose.
Waitsfornoone t1_jdk84le wrote
Reply to comment by ZaphodBeeblebrox2019 in My wife was just in a minor accident. She's told the police that the man she hit was on his phone and drinking a Coke at the time by Gil-Gandel
Exactly whose bush was interfered with?
Stealfur t1_jdk7l0l wrote
Reply to comment by Tromboneguy_65 in I went to the zoo today and there were 2 baguettes in a cage by MrRickSter
Ah Scheisse
Waitsfornoone t1_jdk7etr wrote
Reply to comment by rigabamboo in My wife was just in a minor accident. She's told the police that the man she hit was on his phone and drinking a Coke at the time by Gil-Gandel
That wily Bus Driver always seems to show up when kinky sex is involved.
[deleted] t1_jdk7b5c wrote
Reply to comment by AspiredTheory in There has been much said and sung about the "Eye Of The Tiger", but how come no one ever talks about the other four letters? by LOHare
[removed]
Darthpuppy2008 t1_jdk2whk wrote
Reply to I gave a woman my umbrella yesterday by h3llofaRide
Congratulations I guess
digital_pocket_watch t1_jdk2q3k wrote
Reply to comment by Dyno8man in I went to the zoo today and there were 2 baguettes in a cage by MrRickSter
I can hear the wheating through the screen
Dyno8man t1_jdk2hit wrote
Reply to comment by digital_pocket_watch in I went to the zoo today and there were 2 baguettes in a cage by MrRickSter
I yield. No pain, no grain, and I have felt the pain
boisterile t1_jdk28xq wrote
I went to the zoo the other day. It was terrible, they only had one animal. It was a dog. It was a shih tzu.
digital_pocket_watch t1_jdk1zfm wrote
Reply to comment by Dyno8man in I went to the zoo today and there were 2 baguettes in a cage by MrRickSter
I'm a lady, and I'm not sour, you're the one who seems like you're in grain.
EpicChallenger t1_jdkht11 wrote
Reply to A velociraptor struts into a bar, and the bartender exclaims, "Hold up! We don't serve your kind here." by entrendre_entendre
Screw you and take my upvote