Recent comments in /f/Jokes
Revolutionary_Ask226 t1_jdjc20j wrote
Reply to comment by scottxian in My wife was just in a minor accident. She's told the police that the man she hit was on his phone and drinking a Coke at the time by Gil-Gandel
Time to clean your filthy workshop!
Southernmanny t1_jdjbvxn wrote
I went to a zoo yesterday it had one dog. It was a shih tzu
Observer10568 t1_jdjbjge wrote
Reply to I gave a woman my umbrella yesterday by h3llofaRide
This is a very dry joke.
ZephRyder t1_jdja37d wrote
Reply to comment by amerkanische_Frosch in I went to the zoo today and there were 2 baguettes in a cage by MrRickSter
Not only hadYour excitement risen to the top, but the glass seemed the yeast of your worries!
criminalsunrise t1_jdj9ouv wrote
True story, the girlfriend of one of the gold robbers in the 80s who stole 3 tonnes from a depot in Heathrow called her two guard dogs Brinks and Mat, because the depot was owned by Brinks-Mat!
Bonferroniuser t1_jdj9i3h wrote
I thought ‘hack job’, which is also pretty good.
EvitaPuppy t1_jdj8xys wrote
Reply to My wife was just in a minor accident. She's told the police that the man she hit was on his phone and drinking a Coke at the time by Gil-Gandel
I believe his exact words were... 'This is my own private domicile and I will not be harrased....'
Adventurous-Cook7789 t1_jdj8x8k wrote
Dont make à meal out of it, it was a simple joke with no filler....just butter
[deleted] t1_jdj7upy wrote
Reply to I started dating a blind girl. by DooleyMTV
[removed]
curveball_82 t1_jdj6zoo wrote
Reply to I started dating a blind girl. by DooleyMTV
r/twosentencehorror
fullFlick73 t1_jdj6wl3 wrote
Reply to I started dating a blind girl. by DooleyMTV
That's why you date a blind woman whose husband is a mute.
peanutsfordarwin t1_jdj6ss9 wrote
Reply to I gave a woman my umbrella yesterday by h3llofaRide
Um. Brella. Brella. Brella
wellchicane475 t1_jdj66lr wrote
Reply to I started dating a blind girl. by DooleyMTV
If you mess up dating a blind woman and she dumps you, just change your voice and try again!
bardbelle t1_jdj5mti wrote
Readers—-Take your bad jokes and baguette!
JamesyWamesy1 t1_jdj5gy2 wrote
Reply to comment by taleofbenji in I went to the zoo today and there were 2 baguettes in a cage by MrRickSter
If you want to watch though, it'll cost you 5c for each thrust, or pumpernickel.
in2dips t1_jdj4sgw wrote
Reply to comment by amerkanische_Frosch in I went to the zoo today and there were 2 baguettes in a cage by MrRickSter
World of panes.
grumblyoldman t1_jdj4k8q wrote
Reply to comment by johnsolomon in I went to the zoo today and there were 2 baguettes in a cage by MrRickSter
It's the yeast they could do for them
Independent-Ad1747 t1_jdj4dkb wrote
Reply to Why is joking about old mens nuts so easy? by Smalk
This should get a SAG award.
1TenDesigns t1_jdj2fxm wrote
Reply to comment by firebolt_wt in My wife was just in a minor accident. She's told the police that the man she hit was on his phone and drinking a Coke at the time by Gil-Gandel
My Dad is 80. He still has a landline, but last summer he told us kids to use his cell as the default now. I think he's getting rid of it this year.
My Mom is 78, and broke. She uses the landline because it's cheaper. My brother and I talked at Christmas about just putting her on one of our plans instead. Unlimited talk and text plus shared data for like 20 bux more a month. She pays 25ish for very limited minutes.
Green-Dragon-14 t1_jdj18pn wrote
Took my son to the zoo today. There was only one dog there. It was a Shih Tzu
Icom t1_jdj13zk wrote
You poor poor americans, here it's free.
Nanotekzor t1_jdj0zfd wrote
Reply to I gave a woman my umbrella yesterday by h3llofaRide
So dad joke..
JohnTequilaWoo t1_jdj0ib0 wrote
Reply to comment by Sapphire580 in My wife was just in a minor accident. She's told the police that the man she hit was on his phone and drinking a Coke at the time by Gil-Gandel
Agreed. Saying her would have made it funnier.
rascible t1_jdj0fi6 wrote
Reply to comment by FlashpointJ24 in My wife was just in a minor accident. She's told the police that the man she hit was on his phone and drinking a Coke at the time by Gil-Gandel
Thief: "Your money or your wife" Henry Youngman "I'm thinking it over..."
celtsmaywin t1_jdjei7z wrote
Reply to What do you call an inexpensive circumcision? by masterbrand44
Maybe just a cheap cut of meat