Recent comments in /f/Jokes
BloodiedBlues t1_jcj9ayz wrote
Reply to comment by Bdellio in A genie says to an alcoholic drifter, "You have three wishes, what would you like for your first wish"? by StraightDildo
I’d swim down and drown to get drunk!
Lord_Havelock t1_jcj75nq wrote
Reply to comment by jet_heller in A genie says to an alcoholic drifter, "You have three wishes, what would you like for your first wish"? by StraightDildo
No, because you'll eventually oversupply the market, and your product will lose value.
Of course you could still become very rich by selling it rationally, but try for infinite and you'll either crash your business, or the entire economy.
relpmeraggy t1_jcj5n6a wrote
Well it’s a good thing you didn’t draw on glasses, or she could have seen it better.
BraindeadBanana t1_jcj5iqp wrote
Reply to comment by stillusingphrasing in A genie says to an alcoholic drifter, "You have three wishes, what would you like for your first wish"? by StraightDildo
Hey I didn’t know my mom used Reddit
DressOne2628 t1_jcj3ofj wrote
Another One. What do a wife and a grenade have in common? They both leave you hurt when you pull off the ring.
Grantley34 t1_jcj38cd wrote
Reply to comment by JBluehawk21 in A genie says to an alcoholic drifter, "You have three wishes, what would you like for your first wish"? by StraightDildo
But why does he need two of them?
c7music t1_jciz598 wrote
That was ink-redibly rude of you.
mtwstr t1_jciwl1v wrote
Reply to comment by Professor-Clegg in A genie says to an alcoholic drifter, "You have three wishes, what would you like for your first wish"? by StraightDildo
The Scrooge mcduck approach
calvinweight t1_jcivg79 wrote
If you did she would be remarkable
Lower_Explanation6 t1_jciu6or wrote
Reply to A genie says to an alcoholic drifter, "You have three wishes, what would you like for your first wish"? by StraightDildo
Smart guy. He now has two very valauble assets
stillusingphrasing t1_jcit3zi wrote
Reply to comment by Petal_Chatoyance in A genie says to an alcoholic drifter, "You have three wishes, what would you like for your first wish"? by StraightDildo
You mean "heaven"
evileyeball t1_jcisbaz wrote
How did David feel about you groping him?
hoosyourdaddyo t1_jcirght wrote
Reply to comment by AlliedDeerskin in My wife divororced me because she caught me groping pasta by Dunge0nMast0r
Did you see the snail driving his Cadillac with a giant “S” on the side? The one that makes you say “look at that s car go!”
Salnj t1_jcirge2 wrote
Was it Rick or Tony?
5degreenegativerake t1_jcio8v5 wrote
I heard she had a threesome with Fred Achini and Alfredo.
uncre8tv t1_jcilnoq wrote
Reply to A genie says to an alcoholic drifter, "You have three wishes, what would you like for your first wish"? by StraightDildo
I would re-sale the liquor and make enough to have a comfortable life. Then, upon my death, I would have the city install it as a public fountain, ever pouring for my fellow citizens.
jet_heller t1_jcilgpt wrote
Reply to comment by JBluehawk21 in A genie says to an alcoholic drifter, "You have three wishes, what would you like for your first wish"? by StraightDildo
An infinite amount of money, one might say.
dmlane t1_jcij0fv wrote
Reply to There are 10 types of people: Those who understand binary, those who don't by KoopaTrooper5011
Two types of people: those who dichotomize and those who don’t.
[deleted] t1_jciescc wrote
[deleted] t1_jci97ad wrote
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FuriousJorge67 t1_jci70gz wrote
My wife got mad when I put all of our pasta in the bank. I said to her, "Hey a penne saved is a penne earned."
Professor-Clegg t1_jci43w7 wrote
Reply to comment by infinit9 in A genie says to an alcoholic drifter, "You have three wishes, what would you like for your first wish"? by StraightDildo
I see that. The joke is that the drifter is an idiot.
Brigadius t1_jci3bx4 wrote
Reply to A genie says to an alcoholic drifter, "You have three wishes, what would you like for your first wish"? by StraightDildo
And the third wish?
BloodiedBlues t1_jcj9byw wrote
Reply to comment by BloodiedBlues in A genie says to an alcoholic drifter, "You have three wishes, what would you like for your first wish"? by StraightDildo
Rye whiskey rye whiskey