Recent comments in /f/Jokes
dgm42 t1_ja9u3hf wrote
Reply to Yo mama so fat by LeoReddit2019
When she got flesh eating disease the doctor said she had only 10 years to live.
LoyeDamnCrowe t1_ja9tzsv wrote
Reply to comment by Mindless-Calendar-20 in My mom used to tuck me in when I was young by Psyman2
He puts the lotion on his skin.
[deleted] t1_ja9tvt2 wrote
Reply to comment by Far_Sentence3700 in An engineer dies and goes up to heaven. by MadisonPearGarden
[deleted]
h0nkyJ t1_ja9tuc8 wrote
Reply to What drugs do ducks do? by CK_HAMAD48
This sounds like it should be printed on a 5% ABV Popcicle's stick.
intheyard305 t1_ja9ttka wrote
Reply to I tried to hit on an IT woman by gilfromisrael
Say virtual woman if that's what you mean, you'll taking these pronouns to far.
barronelli t1_ja9tr36 wrote
In hard and dry? You’re doing it wrong.
booherm t1_ja9tnrk wrote
🤣🤣 good one!
hudrogen2 t1_ja9th53 wrote
Reply to What do you call a dictionary thief? by HawtSinnamon
Would have been more relevant 3 days ago
Reduce1 t1_ja9tfb5 wrote
Reply to What's a simple method for calculating the number of bees in a beehive? by TargetOfPerpetuity
The answer is one. One b in beehive.
Jim_songs t1_ja9tdcr wrote
crashespad t1_ja9tbzz wrote
Reply to Statistically there are by crispilly
75% of all statistics are made up... Including this one.
NoremaCg t1_ja9tbwj wrote
Reply to comment by pee_diddy in I’m opening a Tom Petty themed Japanese Restaurant by mattisfunny
Hot dogs, large fries, add some crispy bacon, take it out all night
It was
An American grill
joe1404 t1_ja9t830 wrote
A biscuit dipped in tea or coffee
intheyard305 t1_ja9t4su wrote
Reply to What's a simple method for calculating the number of bees in a beehive? by TargetOfPerpetuity
Oh that's how your doing it. Well I have a fool proof method. Wear total body covering, leaving your genitals and upper thigh exposed. Agitate hive vigorously until bees stop stinging. After 1/2 hour. Remove, then count stingers that is the female pop. The add 1/100 of that no. for male pop. Will give fairly reliable results. Easy peasy.
[deleted] t1_ja9sxey wrote
Reply to comment by Skipper3943 in "Cell" and its derivatives (Cellular, Cellulose, Cellulite, etc.) are the only English words where the C is pronounced like an S. by tsatsawassa
Cedric Diggory (harry potter reference lol)
GlobalTravelR t1_ja9swj0 wrote
If you insult their food they tell you "Don't come around here no more!"
[deleted] t1_ja9stx1 wrote
Reply to "Cell" and its derivatives (Cellular, Cellulose, Cellulite, etc.) are the only English words where the C is pronounced like an S. by tsatsawassa
There’s also cereal, circle, circumference, certain, and center
[deleted] t1_ja9spvd wrote
Reply to Yo mama so fat by LeoReddit2019
[deleted]
QuackedOutDuck t1_ja9sopj wrote
Reply to What drugs do ducks do? by CK_HAMAD48
I feel attacked.
Backwardshock t1_ja9sjvo wrote
Reply to What do you call a dictionary thief? by HawtSinnamon
Was expecting ADDictionary.
Yours was better.
BorderlineStef t1_ja9shsf wrote
Reply to What drugs do ducks do? by CK_HAMAD48
Whatever they can snort with a bill!
The_Classic_Guy_MC t1_ja9sgt5 wrote
Reply to How to start ascending a flight of stairs: by KeckyOK
Step 1
Step 2
Step 3
Step 4
Step 5
Step 6
Step 7
Step 8
Step 9
Step 10
Step 11
Step 12
Step 13
Step 14
Phew, done!
djscorpio74 t1_ja9sgff wrote
palebluedotcitizen t1_ja9sfo7 wrote
Reply to Yo mama so fat by LeoReddit2019
Yo mama so fat when I swerved to avoid her I ran out of gas!
momentimori t1_ja9u42v wrote
Reply to comment by Bruhdale-dingle in The captain asks a seamen to tell him how "2" is written in Latin. by Anaklysmos12345
Don't ask about Roger the cabin boy.