Recent comments in /f/Jokes

oldkicker53 t1_ja9i3gh wrote

Reply to An engineer dies and goes up to heaven. by MadisonPearGarden

Bride and groom to be are killed in separate car wrecks on the way to the ceremony. Off to heaven they go. They meet Saint Peter and ask if he can arrange for them to get married in heaven. “Let me see what I can do”, Saint Pete says. After what seems like an eternity the couple ask Saint Peter what the status of their request is. “Be patient” is his only reply. Ages go by and go by and the couple repeatedly ask Saint Peter for an update. “Be patient.” Finally they ask and Saint Peter says that they can get married. They have a lovely ceremony and settle into heavenly married bliss. But it doesn’t last and they just can’t stand each other after a while.

They go back to Saint Peter to ask about a heavenly divorce. Pete blows his top, “You saw how long it took to find a priest up here and now you want me to find a lawyer?!?!”

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D3veated t1_ja9hzai wrote

Reply to Statistically there are by crispilly

The Vatican is 0.17 square miles. As long as there's at least one pope in the country, then that's about 5.88 popes per square mile.

Now, if the pope is only there 1/3 of the time, then the math checks out.

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