Recent comments in /f/Jokes
unripenedboyparts t1_j6fbeu1 wrote
Reply to I got kicked out of a restaurant for having improper dress. Reminds me of a funny story. by Jackrwood
Alternate version:
An Afghan, an Albanian, and Algerian, an American, an Andorran, an Angolan, an Antiguan, an Argintine, an Armenian, and Austrailian, an Austrian, an Azerbaijani, a Bahamian, a Bahraini, a Bangladeshi, a Barbadian, a Barbudans, a Batswanan, a Belarusian, a Belgian, a Belizean, a Beninese, a Bhutanese, a Bolivian, a Bosnian, a Brazilian, a Brit, a Bruneian, a Bulgarian, a Burkinabe, a Burmese, a Burundian, a Cambodian, a Cameroonian, a Canadian, a Cape Verdean, a Central African, a Chadian, a Chilean, a Chinese, a Colombian, a Comoran, a Congolese, a Costa Rican, a Croatian, a Cuban, a Cypriot, a Czech, a Dane, a Djibouti, a Dominican, a Dutchman, an East Timorese, an Ecuadorean, an Egyptian, an Emirian, an Equatorial Guinean, an Eritrean, an Estonian, an Ethiopian, a Fijian, a Filipino, a Finn, a Frenchman, a Gabonese, a Gambian, a Georgian, a German, a Ghanaian, a Greek, a Grenadian, a Guatemalan, a Guinea-Bissauan, a Guinean, a Guyanese, a Haitian, a Herzegovinian, a Honduran, a Hungarian, an I-Kiribati, an Icelander, an Indian, an Indonesian, an Iranian, an Iraqi, an Irishman, an Israeli, an Italian, an Ivorian, a Jamaican, a Japanese, a Jordanian, a Kazakhstani, a Kenyan, a Kittian and Nevisian, a Kuwaiti, a Kyrgyz, a Laotian, a Latvian, a Lebanese, a Liberian, a Libyan, a Liechtensteiner, a Lithuanian, a Luxembourger, a Macedonian, a Malagasy, a Malawian, a Malaysian, a Maldivan, a Malian, a Maltese, a Marshallese, a Mauritanian, a Mauritian, a Mexican, a Micronesian, a Moldovan, a Monacan, a Mongolian, a Moroccan, a Mosotho, a Motswana, a Mozambican, a Namibian, a Nauruan, a Nepalese, a New Zealander, a Nicaraguan, a Nigerian, a Nigerien, a North Korean, a Northern Irishman, a Norwegian, an Omani, a Pakistani, a Palauan, a Palestinian, a Panamanian, a Papua New Guinean, a Paraguayan, a Peruvian, a Pole, a Portuguese, a Qatari, a Romanian, a Russian, a Rwandan, a Saint Lucian, a Salvadoran, a Samoan, a San Marinese, a Sao Tomean, a Saudi, a Scottish, a Senegalese, a Serbian, a Seychellois, a Sierra Leonean, a Singaporean, a Slovakian, a Slovenian, a Solomon Islander, a Somali, a South African, a South Korean, a Spaniard, a Sri Lankan, a Sudanese, a Surinamer, a Swazi, a Swede, a Swiss, a Syrian, a Taiwanese, a Tajik, a Tanzanian, a Thai, a Togolese, a Tongan, a Trinidadian or Tobagonian, a Tunisian, a Turkish, a Tuvaluan, a Ugandan, a Ukrainian, a Uruguayan, a Uzbekistani, a Venezuelan, a Vietnamese, a Welshman, a Yemenite, a Zambian and a Zimbabwean all go to a nightclub...
The doorman stops them and says “Sorry I can’t let you in without a Thai.”
The Albanian objects, "But I have a Thai!"
The doorman says sheepishly, "Apologies, sir. I couldn't see anything under the Afghan."
alternative_drinks t1_j6fbcp1 wrote
Reply to comment by hoosyourdaddyo in A blond and a lawyer are flying to Cleveland by hoosyourdaddyo
and made it worse.
AcrossChoke48 t1_j6fb6lp wrote
Reply to What did the Buddhist say to the hotdog vender? by SD_yt
After paying with a $20, the Buddhist was waiting for his change.
The hotdog vendor says, ‟what are you waiting for, change comes from within.”
TheMadWoodcutter t1_j6fb410 wrote
Reply to Wayne Gretzky is going down on his wife, she cums all over his face and says messy eh? by Soleserious
Fuck Messier.
contraries t1_j6fb0rv wrote
Reply to What did the Buddhist say to the hotdog vender? by SD_yt
Why did the Buddhist coroner get fired? He kept listing the cause of death as birth
unripenedboyparts t1_j6fau11 wrote
Reply to comment by onairmastering in Warning... dirty joke by OldSamVimes
Because multiple dudes get blown by a gorilla.
unripenedboyparts t1_j6faajx wrote
Reply to comment by Soleserious in Wayne Gretzky is going down on his wife, she cums all over his face and says messy eh? by Soleserious
I confused hockey with football, Messier with Messi and still got the joke.
sanpawl t1_j6faad3 wrote
Reply to What did the Buddhist say to the hotdog vender? by SD_yt
The Buddhist gave the hot dog guy a $20 and ask for change.
But the hot dog guy said, ‟change must come from within.”
IEatCatz4Fun t1_j6fa3uo wrote
Reply to What do you call a dog with no legs? by EarthMarsUranus
A dogter.
Russc70 t1_j6f9y65 wrote
Reply to comment by wrenchbenderornot in This man went out with the boys, and told his wife that he would be home by midnight. by Jackrwood
Nice repost without actually reposting!
PlungesIntoTheVoid t1_j6f9whl wrote
Reply to comment by PlungesIntoTheVoid in What did the Buddhist say to the hotdog vender? by SD_yt
And finally says: where’s my change?
The hotdog vendor replies: change only comes from within.
[deleted] t1_j6f9ngf wrote
Reply to You know what sucks? by BassGSnewtype
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[deleted] t1_j6f9jd2 wrote
Reply to comment by PlungesIntoTheVoid in What did the Buddhist say to the hotdog vender? by SD_yt
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[deleted] t1_j6f9fx4 wrote
Reply to What did the Buddhist say to the hotdog vender? by SD_yt
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PlungesIntoTheVoid t1_j6f9f71 wrote
Reply to comment by PlungesIntoTheVoid in What did the Buddhist say to the hotdog vender? by SD_yt
And waits
bleachedgasshole t1_j6f9e95 wrote
I get it and it's funny
PlungesIntoTheVoid t1_j6f9dms wrote
Reply to comment by PlungesIntoTheVoid in What did the Buddhist say to the hotdog vender? by SD_yt
And waits
PlungesIntoTheVoid t1_j6f9cnk wrote
Reply to What did the Buddhist say to the hotdog vender? by SD_yt
So the hotdog vendor gives him the most amazing hotdog and says, that will be $5 The Buddhist gives him a twenty
OptimusPrimel984 t1_j6f938o wrote
Reply to comment by spirallyBlue844 in A Winnipeg man dies and goes to hell. by J_S_M_K
I just accepted the temperature as Celsius...
maxchris t1_j6f90pa wrote
Reply to What did the Buddhist say to the hotdog vender? by SD_yt
Why did the Buddhist say to the hot dog vendor when asked to pay? Be the change you seek!
[deleted] t1_j6f8cnr wrote
Reply to comment by unselfishdata in A guy walks into a bar... by unselfishdata
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DevilsDadkc t1_j6f85mr wrote
Gotcha, nice...
hoosyourdaddyo OP t1_j6f805r wrote
Reply to comment by DevilsDadkc in A blond and a lawyer are flying to Cleveland by hoosyourdaddyo
I put a twist on the old joke
CptBartender t1_j6f7umh wrote
Reply to comment by mrben77 in I got kicked out of a restaurant for having improper dress. Reminds me of a funny story. by Jackrwood
For a second I thought he'll start hitting his kid with those jumper cables or something...
Big_Ad_6154 t1_j6fbkny wrote
Reply to What do you call a dog with no legs? by EarthMarsUranus
Sausage