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Everyone knows the second part reads "You have been removed from the group."

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It will be okay. It will.

My husband went through a very nasty break up when his first wife left him and started a relationship almost immediately after. She moved in the new boyfriend and shortly after this started having the kids call him dad. It was horrible for him. He eventually decided that he needed to move on. He started doing things he couldn’t do in the marriage, like watching tv, listen to the music he likes, eat foods he didn’t get to eat, buy the shirts he liked, etc. you may not have had a controlling partner like this but I’m sure there is some freedoms you can enjoy that are being rewarded to you. You have a child free night I’m assuming. Get together with your girlfriend. Go out dancing. Put on a dress that makes you feel sexy. Pick up a hobby. Start going to the gym. Join a running group. You can’t get over the pain you can only get through it.

My husband made some of his deepest friendships post divorce and reconnected with old friends. Looking at him now va pictures then you can see how much lighter and happier he is.

He’s now obviously remarried and we share a child but he says even though it was the worst pain emotionally, mentally, and financially and biggest failure for him, he’s glad it happened. He got to reclaim his life. Anyone who isn’t invested in the gift that is YOU is not someone worth having around.

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This is what we needed

I am glad he wasn't paralyzed there was better out there about one thing. You.

I'm a lot like him, I think. At a certain point I realized that 99% of anyone's potential (including my own) is already gone by the time you're an adult.

A lot of people are multi-talented but how many of us can really be a fighter pilot and a film director and a musician and a chef and know 5 different languages at the same time? And how many less can be the best at any given one of those? Each one is going to take at least some portion of your life to learn let alone master. Can you fit in 50 masteries? 20? Or even just 1? There's always more time to see France, but oh, you have to make sure to fit in India and the Bahamas and Japan and Iceland!

There's too much to do, and every minute you're not doing it is costing you potential. I think once you have that mindset of "time is finite but so is potential" you start to reach out to try and do as much as you still can with the time you still have left. It becomes less about perfection and more about just doing it. So maybe you can't learn 5 languages in a year but if you start now and just do the thing you could maybe learn one. And maybe even learn to cook too before you're done.

For me personally as long as I make some impact on the world before my time is up, I'll consider that enough.

Well, as I said, I'm quite fine where I am now. But giving up on your life goals, just because of some internet voodoo philosophy meme that took 30 second to make... No, that's not the way to find happiness

>But if in ten years time I'm no closer... Yeah, then it's a problem.

What's the alternative? If you're still single in ten years, do you think adding bitterness and depression to the equation are going to help you find a partner?

I think not. I think the age-old paradoxical advice is correct... you're most likely to attract a partner when you've found happiness within yourself.

I want to write a book, yet I deeply struggle with ‘I’ve never written anything like this before, is it going to be crap, why would anyone want to read my crap’

I sorta get that it’s just my irrational insecurities yet knowing that isn’t enough to ignore those voices either.

Second is the best

The first step to being good at something is being pretty bad at it.

What type of mindset, though? That's pretty important.

> Most aviation historians believe the Wright Brothers met the criteria to be considered the inventors of the first successful airplane before Santos-Dumont because the Wright Flyer was heavier-than-air, manned and powered, able to take off and land under its own power and controllable along three axes

https://www.history.com/news/history-faceoff-who-was-first-in-flight#:~:text=Most%20aviation%20historians%20believe%20the,axes%20in%20order%20to%20avoid

Also you spelled Dumont wrong.

That why I don't wanna stop I just want to keep moving cause I believe it gonna be alright

Another reddit page I am on was having a discussion about a quote from GK Chesterton who famously said "if a thing is worth doing, it's worth doing badly." He wasn't defending poor efforts, but he was depending the worthwhile-ness of an activity. Example - reading books to your children is good even if you stammer over words. Making the honest effort to workout even if it wasn't amazing.

You didn’t really get what he said in that last part lol. The Wright brothers killed a few people themselves to make those planes.

You sound like an idiot, do you realize that?

Yes! Travel and see people but remember to give yourself a productive goal, one that contributes and impacts others. I mentioned volunteering because it helps people that might be less fortunate and it’ll bring perspective to how we see everyday lives. I think you will be fine, you are now more introspective than most out there, but being introspective is just the first step, if you don’t act on it, you will start thinking yourself into a downward spiral.

Yea, I googled the actor's name (Wayne Knight) and the start of the quote after I commented and found it.

For whatever reason I though this was from a Power Rangers special from the last 10 years or so with the guy in red being one of the many previous Red Rangers that wanted to keep a low profile and Wayne Knight saying "Hey everyone, it's the Red Ranger!....."

Not sure if you're joking but it's Jurassic Park (the original).

You're right, but i also see where it comes for. Our whole education and society is very harsh towards mistakes. They aren't treated as learning opportunities they are treated as fuck ups and failures. So i can see how that would develop a fear of doing things imperfectly.